Have you been chatting up my girlfriend?

Along the coast road to Guayaquil are numerous plantations: cocoa, coffee, castor bean, fibers, and bananas. Here grow the tropical lipstick trees – source of color for foods — and the flowering African tulips.

‘[…] I remember a lady coming to inspect St. Mary's Home where I was brought up and seeing us all in our lovely Elizabethan uniforms we were so proud of, and bursting into tears all over us because “it was wicked to dress us like charity children”. […]’.

I was bombarded with hysterical Black Friday offers to upgrade my telly, my tablet, my computer, my phone and my DVD player. Why in the name of G5 would I want to do that? I already have to negotiate my way, weepily, round four doofers (as in “it’ll do for that”, aka a remote) just to watch I’m a Celebrity…