We defy nature to protect our physical and psychological integrity, relentlessly seeking to prove that we can outprocess our own biological identities.

she’s only been on one date at uni, which involved sitting at a bar with a male specimen she’d thought was an interesting person, who was obviously swiping his phone to see if someone more fanciable was in the vicinity before making his pathetic excuses about having to do revision

Meanwhile, lip-rouged and nail-polished girls, some attired in abbreviated shorts, sent gasoline sales rocketing upward 50 per cent at Oakland and Long Beach.

They beat us last year, so this year's win was payback.