We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.

It is then dipped into the Flambeau, where it is brushed and cleaned, then passed to the Sirop, where it is further brushed, and finally into the Batterie, where it is concentrated to the granulating point—a density of about 45 degrees Baumé, and with a temperature of about 240 degrees Fahrenheit.

Yet, though the piece is preposterous hokum, the show is put across with enormous zest.

The only position he liked for screwing was doggie-style.