I made a speaking trumpet of my hands and commenced to whoop “Ahoy!” and “Hello!” at the top of my lungs. […] The Colonel woke up, and, after asking what in brimstone was the matter, opened his mouth and roared “Hi!” and “Hello!” like the bull of Bashan.

Luok, leyke mad bulls they bang about, / Wi' shouts their thropples rivan, / Wheyle whup for smack the rabble rout, / Are yen owr tother drivan; …]

In between looking after Damp and producing ovensful of delicious food, Mrs McLachlan would spend approximately one hour each week attempting to tidy up the mess, but so far had made little impression.

the long road to writerly recognition is riddled with disappointment.