Despite being slightly more realistic than the Angelina Jolie movies, the new Tomb Raider is fully of super-unbelievable, off-the-wall stuff. First of all, Lara Croft doesn't die or seriously injure anything even though she spends the whole movie getting shot at and almost falling over waterfalls.

The Venetian captain, prodding among the butts and bales of the cargo, had discovered a stowaway--a fat, sandy-haired man in worn leather, snoring bibulously among the barrels.

This is a Government that meets its economic targets and does not move the goalposts.

Gammon and pickles, she mumbled. She tried to shrug off the effects of her own overactive imagination and failed miserably.